The Other Brother

AMDG I, a man (like a bear) safe and warm in his cave, seeing the snow blanket the earth in white, watching the stuff glitter in the air, hearing the wind howl, to you, Reader, wherever you are, warm in your cave or cold in the wind. Love and peace to you, and Christmas greetings. We raise our hearts in thanks to the Lord who has given us so much, even himself. I hope it makes you leap for joy to be so near to one so great! Rejoice! Lately I have known a certain unease in how easy things have been for me. Despite being unacceptable to the church as a religious candidate, I have felt the warmth of Jesuit and Franciscan men affirming and encouraging me. In the valley, I have met a marvelous friend. Within my community, I have found that my bishop is LGBTQ-friendly, my pastor preaches unity, my city is full of allies, and my workplace is proudly queer. I have found prominent voices in the church decrying the marginalization of LGBTQ people and I have found backstage hands also working...

AMDG I, a creature with one foot in the world and one in the Heavens, to you, my brothers and sisters in this crazy, worldly, divine life. Hope, faith, joy, and peace to you on this fourth Sunday of Advent! I hope you cannot be tired, between Thanksgiving and Christmas, of the theme of love. An American Paradigm We operate here in the USA under a paradigm of earning our way. We believe in hard work and just reward. Not only is there is an idealistic grace to this, but in a darker way it also permeates every other part of our lives. Tying it into my vocation story, for example, I had an unconscious certitude that I could earn my place in a religious order: if they saw what a good man and earnest Catholic I am, surely they could find a place for me. I also find myself trying to earn my relationships, wondering about how much I am giving versus receiving; if I am deserving; what I can do for the other to justify the relationship. As a white, middle class youth and man, I have for ...

 AMDG I, a Catholic in the United States, to you, my unknown cosmopolitan reader. Grace and peace! This week I participate in our wonderful spiritual and secular tradition of thanksgiving. Nothing more and nothing less. I have had some wonderful trips and adventures this year. I am thankful for a Charismatic parish retreat last fall, the Encounter Conference in December (recommended), and the Jesuit ordination weekend this summer. For some major vacation-travel, some minor outings, as well as the local hikes and walks. For all the moments when I just sat on my porch or took a moment outside our daily mass chapel to take in the ordinary beauty of the day. I am thankful for all the fun events I attended with the Jesuit vocation team, friends, and coworkers. For hearing the birds sing. I thank God for the job I left and the ways it challenged me to grow. I am extremely grateful for my new job, for the work I do and for the ripple effects of a greatly improved work-life balance....

AMDG I, a creature in awe of Christ the King, fearful and loyal and enraptured, to you, my brothers and sisters carrying your crosses beside me in hope of the same glory. Today I relate two simple stories. Recently I got up the courage to talk to my pastor about having a vocation and being transgender. I had been putting it off for weeks, and finally got up the courage to send a text. (I find that texts are great for committing oneself despite fear.) Finally I stayed after daily mass and we had a brief chat. When I gave him my elevator-length story, he paused a moment before beginning to share his ideas and recommendations for how I might pursue my vocation to brotherhood. A good man! Not that long ago I also shared being transgender with one of my best friends, who I have known only a few years. She already knew I had entered discernment so it was easier to commit myself to an honest explanation of the result, yet I struggled more to find my tongue. Maybe because she is more patient, ...

AMDG  I, a slave of Christ, small by all measures and yet chosen by him for some mysterious end, to you, my sister or brother, who are chosen also for the glory of God. Grace and peace. We know that it is good to be open to the Spirit. Scripture is rife with examples of people who literally drop what they are doing to obey the prompting of the Spirit: Philip with the Ethiopian Eunuch comes to mind, as well as the calling of James and John. Many of the prophets, too. These exemplars point to a life lived moment to moment, not planning too much for the future because we wait expectantly on God, confident in his designs. Yet this is, for most of us, an extreme. Surely a lot of scheming went into the rebuilding of Jerusalem after the return of the Babylonian exiles; Paul must have employed his own mind in much of his mission work; etc. We make plans big and small without infringing upon the sovereignty of God. Ideally, our process includes prayer and our plans are open to the interve...

AMDG I, a fool in love, graced to hear God in scripture, word, and prayer, to you, the kind soul who will listen to and walk with me. Recently, over a period of only a few days, I witnessed the stories from scripture of many unclean people. At the same time, I have been wrestling with my own role in bringing myself and other transgender Catholics into full, consummate communion with the church. I started writing in the middle of it, and here is how God brought it together. Unclean Figures The first person I encountered was the Hemorrhaging Woman. Following a special reading from Mark 5 , the preacher dug into the woman’s suffering, pointing out that she had probably not been able to come to church for 12 years due to her condition. After her healing, when Jesus asked who touched him, she had to overcome both “tears and fears:” it was a scandal for her to be out and worse that she had touched the Teacher, making him unclean. She had to confront her shame and embarrassment as wel...

16 October 2022 AMDG I, an ambitious servant of the Lord, wounded in the world and yet hopeful in God’s providence, to you, the Reader, pilgrim of the internet. In my slow journey through the Bible, I recently started into Paul’s letters. I was struck by the following: “We are afflicted in every way, but not constrained; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our body. For we who live are constantly being given up to death for the sake of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death is at work in us, but life in you. … Therefore, we are not discouraged; rather, although our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison…” (2 Corinthians 4:8-12, 16-17) ...